i feel like shit.. i feel dam alone.. i can feel my self retreating deep withing far away from every one.. its consuming me.. like i know the only person i can feel safe with is with my self.. the constant emotional roller coaster rides and the never ending swinging emotions just dont seem to want to settle.. when will there be peace..

i feel far away from friendships.. somehow i dont see my self trying to do smth abt them anymore.. i'll be honest.. as much as i miss it.. i just dont have the urge to pull them back..

xy and i got weird after brian left.. ken.. work has consumed him.. so much for city link skater boys.. iona.. i dont know how to start.. joette.. its just so akward now..army doesnt help.. i used to have time.. now i'm just sad..but who cares.. i'm not sorry things are like this.. i've accepted it and am still head strong.. i love blogs.. i feel better already..